For your new blog response, write at least one well-developed paragraph about your reactions to the "Marry Him" article. [If you haven't read the article yet, budget more time than usual to read it because it's longer than all the others.]
Due: Before our next class meeting
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The article "Marry Him" is a very depressing article in my opinion. The author Lori Gottlieb is talking about just marrying any guy they seem is okay. She says to settle down while you still can. To me that just seems sad. I truly believe there is someone for everyone in this world and you just have to look for them. If you end up settling you don't know what you can miss out of. A marriage should be a partnership yes but there should also be love and understanding. A marriage without love can be very successful but the people won't be happy it's just not possible. Finding the perfect person is possible and you shouldn't give up. It may take a bit longer for some people but it can happen. Marrying just anybody doesn't give you the satisfaction of having children with someone you truly love or of growing old and spending the rest of your life and all of eternity with that person. Marriage just for the sake of being married is not something that will bring you happiness in the long run. For a while you may be happy you're not single but in the end you'll feel lonely because you're married to someone you're not atracted to and to someone you don't truly love. I truly don't agree with the article "Marry Him" no one should ever settle. True love and happiness does exist and they should just keep searching no matter what age.
ReplyDeleteI have to say that Lori Gottlieb, the author of "Marry Me" had a very interesting point. Even though nothing will ever change my idea of finding and marrying my soulmate, her analysis on settling fascinated me. She pointed out that usually single women, over thirty, deep down yearn to get married and have children; even though some women on the surface make it seem like they are okay with what they have. Having many older female cousins that at one point went through this or are currently going through this, I can see how this is true. How she said, family and friends can make harsh jokes to this problem (I've sadly seen this happen). She was talking about how being content in a relationship go hand in hand with being happy, and how marriage is best like a partnership and just having a teammate. I truly do not agree with that. I also don't agree with how she describes a good marriage doesn't have to be romantic or have passion.
ReplyDeleteI think it was clever how she brought up television relationships, like Rachel's from "Friends", and Carrie"s from "Sex and the City". I never actually thought about it but, as women we are "holding out for...the fantasy level of passionate intensity" that will make us happier than the "... stable, reliable life companion" guy like Carrie's ex Aiden on "Sex and the City". She say that relationship advice books teach women how to manipulate a man. She also said that settling is a women's game. These subjects intrigued me.
In my opinion, she makes marriage look like love is a business, and just for plain company. If you dont want to be alone, just get a dog or find a best friend, don't lie to someone and say you love them enough to get married to them. Getting married is a big deal, it suppose to shows the true meaning of love and compassion for one another it's not a compromise or a settlement.
I couldn't disagree with her more!
after reading the article and thinking about the message Lori Gottlieb i can definitely see where she's coming from while making soem of her points, but i'd have to disagree with her overall. I dont' think i could ever settle for anyone to be with for the rest of my life,and have never considered it. She said something in her article that in my mind pretty much shut down the point she was trying to make "if i had settled at 39 I always would have had the fantasy that something better exsists out there."
ReplyDeleteIn this article Lori Gottlieb trys to persuade single women to settle down with any person while they still can. The point that really made the article for me was when she's says that every women reaching her thirties is worried about not having what she has always long for, which is a husband and a child. I personally do think although some people may worry about getting married at a later age, it's not a reason to just seettle down with anyone. In my opinion not marrying the right person really sets the marriage up for failure.
ReplyDeleteIn the article "Marry me" it seems the main point the author is trying to get across is to settle down with anyone even if your not in love. I understand the points the author makes but regardless i think that would be a very bad idea to marry somone you truly do not love. A relationship can go on for long periods of time without love but its more than likely to fail at some point.I beleave in true love and i dont think anyone should just settle. I think every woman wants to get married and have kids at some point but its imprtant to love the person you marry because it will end up in a big mess when you decided to leave that person.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, the article "Marry Him" upset me a little. I am one of those women that always tell myself I won't settle, and here she is telling women to settle for "Mr. Good Enough". Well, I dont want to settle for that. I don't care if I am alone when I am 40. At least that is how I feel right now. There is so much I want to do like see the world, and travel. I don't know if I even want to have children. I hope I never let myself settle, because I think I rather be alone than make myself pretend to be happy.
ReplyDeleteThe article "Mary Him" by Lori Gottlieb she talked about settling down with any person that is good enough. I have to disagree with her point of view. I personally believe its very sad to think people actually think that way. Marriage should not be rushed or looked in that manner. I believe that there is someone for everyone out there, and its not about looking, i believe both will find each other. It usually happens when least suspecting.
ReplyDeleteLori Gottieb says that you need to settle down at a younger age, because you dont want to 30-40 years old and not married. I think no matter what age you are you need to feel 100% committed to the other half and not have and restraints to hold you back. That's why alot of people get divorced, they get married at a young age to someone they dont really know very well and then it causes problems.
ReplyDeleteIn the article "Marry Him", it tells us that the author, Lori Gottieb believes in that women should settle down, when you still have the chance even though, that other person isn't your true sole mate or the love of your life. I don't accept in what the author belives in, becasue someday you will find your true love,and for people who thinks it is hard to find that person, they probably haven't been looking that much. I believe that you shouldn't just settle down, because you just what to get married, you should marry the person that you love, and will want to spend your whole life with and live together happily. So you shouln't just settle down for anybody because if you did, later on this marriage won't last long, so you shouldn't give up on finding the right person for you.
ReplyDeleteI strongly disagree with everything in this article. Gottlieb is telling people who are older to give up on finding true love and settle with what u can get. Why even get married then. Just move in with someone and live together if u don't truly love them. Me personally believe that if you are gonna get married with someone they should be the person that you love and that you believe you will spend the rest of your life with and take care of them. Even if u fight with each other you resolve things and get over it because you love that other person. If you are just gonna settle with someone because that's the best you could get then i think that's disgracing marriage. I could not disagree more with this article, it is pretty depressing.
ReplyDeleteI thing Lori Gottlieb sounds very desperate in her article. I don't agree with a thing she says. You should never settle! I believe there is true love and if it hasn't hit you yet just wait. It will happen. Don't rush and settle for anything less of your expectations! I know true love can happen at any age. My family and I know a couple who found each other in their 40's. The wife had never been married and had waited patiently for the right one. She never settled and it came. It may have been later in life but till this day they are truly in love and happily married. That's proof enough for me that you don't have to settle. I know I'm not!
ReplyDeleteI dont agree with what Lori says. To just marry someone because you just want to be married is perposterous. You marry someone because you love them and want to spend the rest of your life with them, not simply because you have the need to. Even if you are 50 and still not married, keep looking for that person that will make you weak in the knees everytime you see them. Dont just go and marry Joe/Jane Shmoe.
ReplyDeleteIn "Marry Him," by Lori Gottlieb she explains how most 30 to 40 year old women feel that when they reach this age they feel as if they should be married if they are not yet. Women feel that it is better to be settled down married to Mr Right with the whole mine van of children that they always dream of. It in most cases is every persons dream and for their own benefit to be settled down and happy making your family in your house. Don't be affraid to go out there and find your special someone you have and start something with Mr./Mrs. Right.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I do not agree with Lori Gottlieb. Yes I am a man, but I do not agree with settling. Maybe I could never understand sense I am not a "woman." But Lori seems desperate. That she would take something instead of nothing. Usually this is not a problem but using that thinking method toward your marriage? or even your family? is not something to take lightly. Also Lori states that "once your married, its not about whom you want o go on vacation with, its about whom you want to run a household with. Marriage is not a passion-fest, its more like a partnership formed to run a very small, mundane and often boring nonprofit business." I do not believe someone who have never been married should say what marriage is really like. Also, coming from a mans side of things. She acts like as if were there for her choosing, like she is trying to find her "suitable candidate." It almost seems like she would be using her so called "husband."
ReplyDeleteI disgree with Lori Gottlieb in the Article"Marry Him" women should settle for someone they care for and will get along.I think that there are thousands of people with the same qualities the love of youre life has but you still have to look for your love one. I think women should settle for someone thats going to help them and be with them when they are going through something rough. people shouldnt rush into marrage, but i also think that they shouldnt wait that long either.
ReplyDelete"MARRY HIM"
ReplyDeleteTHE WRITER OF THE ARTICLE HAS AN INTRESTING PERSPECTIVE ABOUT MARRIAGE AND I AGREE WITH SOME PARTS BUT NOT ALL. A PERSON SHOULD NOT JUST SETTLE; WHY NOT INSTEAD CONSIDER MARRIAGE BASED ON COMPATIBILITY=LOGIC, INSTEAD OF "LOVE"=FEELINGS. SHE IS RIGHT ABOUT WHY SO MANY MARRIAGES END UP IN DIVORSE AND THE REASON IS NOT THAT PEOPLE DON'T BELIEVE IN MARRIAGE ANYMORE, BUT ITS BECAUSE PEOPLE BELIEVE MARRIAGE TOO MUCH. PEOPLE HAVE DEVELOPED A FAIRY TALE MENTALITY TOWARDS MARRIAGE AND IN REALITY IT MIGHT BE THE TOTAL OPPOSITE BECAUSE IT IS NOT EASY. SOCIOLOGIST HAVE DONE RESEARCH AND THE RESEARCH SHOWS THAT MARRIAGES BASED ON COMPATIBILITY ARE MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN MARRIAGES BASED ON "LOVE". THE END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the "Mary Him" article by Lori Gottlieb she talks about her point of view on marriage. To me, her train of thought on when to get married and just settling for someone is out of whack. I don't believe that there is a certain age gap that you should shot for on when to get married. As long as you are fully aware of who your spouse truly is and your in love with them its ok. Also I don't believe that you should just settle for someone because marriage needs to be taken very serious and you should only marry someone that you are 100% sure you can live with happily for the rest of your life as well as raise a family if you two so desire.
ReplyDeleteIn the article "Marry Him" I can see where Lori has a point but I surely disagree. I believe you should wait till you find the right one to actually settle down because theres just no point in marrying someone you dont love. Since I come from a Middle eastern culture this issue is big. Most women are either forced or pushed to get married to any random guy at a young age before they hit their 30's. Most Arab parents give the whole " Once your 25 no guy is ever going to want you" ...thats a lie! I've seen this all happen with my close friends and even family members. My sister married a random guy because she was 30 and was desperate for a husband. Her marriage ended up in a divorce. There was no love between them, ofcourse it wasnt going to last.So why go through the painand trouble? Just live your life and you'll find that specail partner. My aunt got married at 35 and is happy with two children. Everyone's time to settle will come. Dont rush into it. life is full of surprises you never know whats going to happen, that special person can pop up in your life tomorrow, no one really knows. You just got to play it by ear.I personaly wouldn't get married and settle for just anyone. I don't care if i have to die alone;I have to love and trust the person with my heart before sharing my life with them.
ReplyDeleteIn the artical "Marry Him" i don't agree with the author what so ever. Marriage should be sacred and should be the most solid relationship in your life. So when she said when you find a man that is "okay" to your standards, even if you are not in love with him, to marry him anyways. I also don't agree with her comment on single mothers. I don't think everyone would like to raise a child by themselves especially have their child grow up with out a father figure. It may sound nice if you are single and can't find that mr. right yet, however being a single parent isn't as easy as people may think. Overall i believe marriage and having children should wait until you find that right person and are ready because they are both life long commitments.
ReplyDeleteIn the article “Marry Me” it really makes me think that she regrets ever getting pregnant before she found “the one”. In her passage it mentions how single woman in their 30s should just settle for anyone. This means that if you don’t love the person that you are going to be spending the rest of your life with why marry them in that first place. Wouldn’t you want to be spending the rest of your lives with someone that you do love and respect instead of just having a stranger living with you? From what I think is yes, I would want some one I love and loves me back. Sometime the people you’re spending your life with isn’t the one but its better then just marrying a nobody that may leave later on.
ReplyDeleteI thought that the article was a really bizarre thing to say!! settle down with anyone? I don't think so! I believe that you should marry someone that your happy with. Marrying someone just for the sake to not be alone would hurt you more than to actually be alone. I believe that everyone should find their soul mate. On the other hand since I'm nowhere near 30 i don't know what it feels like to have all of your friends married except you. I know what what it feels like to be alone and not have anyone, but I'd rather be single than to label my self with title "boyfriend & girlfriend" with someone that i don't feel strongly for. I say for any single 30 year old out there find your true love and settle down with the right guy.
ReplyDeleteThe article Marry Me, by Lori Gottlieb has an interesting point, but i still don't agree with it because why would you marry someone you don't love just so you wont be alone? I think that's even worse because since there is no love in the relationship, then the couples are always going to be fighting. I mean sometimes people who love each other fight a lot, now imagine those who sont love each other! Theres a saying in Spanish that says its better to be alone than to be with bad company and I think that is so true. In my opinion, settling with someone you don't love can increase the divorce rate. I think there is a Mr. Right out there for everyone, if you haven't found him at 35 then that means you are not looking in the right places, so look else where because he is out there. Its so sad that pepole are just settling down with someone they feel passion for because they cant find the right person. Chances are you may be happy if you settle down with the person you feel passion for, but i dont think it would be the same if you didnt love them.
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